I really can't take much of the mess that my kids make! I have kept the house in great shape the past few months. It really has been neat and tidy. Today just burst my bubble and hope completely. Michael's room has legos everywhere, Emily's room is totalled.....My room, I just found has marker all over the walls and on my dresser. Emma dumped HALF of a full bottle of hand soap all over the floor, from the kitchen to the fifth downstairs room. All which happened during my one show that I watch on Sundays. I am getting deeper into a hole of darkness. I am anxious all the time.....I don't feel like doing much of anything and don't want to deal with anything. Emma is awake hollering in her crib. I wish I had a grandparent I could just send them to for a week. Mike is like a third breast......just gets in the way. He walked in on Emma doing the soap mess and didn't offer to help clean her or the floor up. I guess he did just get off of work. Yeah, he went in and tutored his retards for four hours. Hard work.....I need help out of this mess. What is positive in my life......
- I have four healthy, beautiful children
- I have a healthy, loving husband
- I am healthy
- We have a new, reliable car
- We have a large home
I should look at the ups but the downs are killing me at this moment. I know I will get over them in the morning with proper sleep but geez! Plus, I compare my life to others around me, people I know, certain friends and family and I have such a great life! I just hope that God has blessings coming for them too soon. I know at least that my Mom's is coming next weekend.....and a friend of mine will hopefully get a healthy little girl this fall. After all THAT girl has gone through and will continue to go through, I hope at least that will come true!
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